Have you found yourself in a funk? That bad mood that doesn’t go away; that complete lack of motivation and excitement for life; that gloomy feeling that you just can’t shake. We’ve all been there.
Maybe you’ve had a spell of bad luck, or something undesirable or downright crummy has happened to bring it on, or maybe nothing has really changed, but you just can’t find your spark. This article is for you.
It’s easy to get frustrated with a bad mood that won’t lift, but what if this funk is guiding you to recognize what’s no longer working so that you can pivot into something better? What if you dove deep into the funk to understand what’s really going on?
This post will walk you through six questions to ask yourself to reflect on this gloomy feeling, so that you can get yourself out of this funk.
6 Steps to get out of a Funk
It’s really hard to get out of a funk if you’re angry or frustrated with yourself for being in the funk in the first place. So before we dive into these six steps, try to set aside your frustrations and go into each step with an open mind.
Step 1: “What am I feeling?”
First things first, you need to get clear on what you’re actually feeling. Sometimes a funk is a blanket of sadness that weighs you down, other times it’s a ball of anger that’s exploding at every turn. Whatever emotion you find is fine, the important thing is that you identify it.
Sometimes a funk can be an continual numbness, where it feels like you don’t feel anything at all. If this is the case for you, I would encourage you to dig a little deeper. Perhaps if you probe a bit, you might find the numbness is a protection mechanism for the more vulnerable emotions underneath.
Step 2: “Where do I feel it in my body?”
Close your eyes and sit with that feeling. If you focus your attention on the feeling, start to notice where in your body you feel it the most. For example, sadness is often felt in the heart, whereas fear can be felt in the stomach or chest.
Taking the time to identify where you feel it in your body allows you to connect with the emotion and yourself a little deeper. It takes you out of your head (which is probably where you’ve spent a lot of time) and back in to your body. This is an important step.
Step 3: “If this feeling could talk, what would it say?”
Now that you’ve identified the emotion, and found it in your body, imagine connecting to it with compassion and curiosity. If this feeling could talk, what would it say?
For example, if you’re feeling sadness, perhaps sadness would say it feels lonely, or perhaps fear would tell you about a stressful situation that hasn’t been resolved. Maybe unmotivated would say that it’s bored with a certain aspect of life, or perhaps anger would express the discontent about a certain person or situation.
It's important to take your time on this step and to stay nonjudgmental. Really sit with this feeling and let it spill whatever has been bottled up. Write it all down and remain in a compassionate, curious state.
Imagine it’s a good friend confiding in you – this isn’t the time to shut yourself down or try to come up with solutions, it’s a time to listen to what your inner voice has to say.
Step 4: “What might this be telling me?”
If you’ve taken your time on step 3, you will have found the surface issue. This is the somewhat-surface level problem that’s triggering a negative reaction within yourself (ie. the big change at work, the unresolved argument with a friend, the boredom in your relationship, etc). This is likely something that you were well aware of, and that you’ve likely tried to fix already.
However, for the purposed of this exercise, I want you to look past the surface-level issue and ask yourself what this might be telling you. If you took a step back, and saw things from a larger framework, what might you find?
Perhaps the unresolved argument with that friend is bothering you because this is an ongoing issue with this friend (or in all your relationships) and it’s telling you that it’s time to resolve this within yourself – maybe by creating better boundaries, or simply by letting go of people that no longer align with you.
If this surface-level issue was a clue to something a little bigger, what would that bigger problem be?
Step 5: “What do I need right now?”
After all you’ve uncovered in the previous steps, it’s time to bring it back to the here and now. Ask yourself, what do I need right now? Perhaps what you really need is permission to take a break – a real break – from the stresses of life. Take a bath, or a walk through the woods, or a saunter on the beach to clear your mind and ground yourself.
Or perhaps what you really need is to have that uncomfortable conversation with your friend, or your boss, or your spouse. If there’s something that’s bothering you, maybe you need to address it so that you can move on. Get honest with yourself about what you need right now.
Step 6: “What tiny step can I take to meet my need?”
You don’t need to solve any big problem right now – you just need to find a way to meet your need in this moment. What tiny step can you take right now, today?
Think of this as a baby step to help get you where you need to go. How can you meet your unmet needs in this moment? Then go do it.
Conclusion
This funk isn’t here just to make life hard – it’s showing you what’s no longer working. Perhaps there are pieces of your life that need to be reassessed, or unresolved problems that need your attention. Whatever you’ve found, just remember that you can (and will) get through this.
If you’ve taken your time going through these six steps, you likely have more clarity on what you’re actually feeling, and steps to take to get out of this funk. If not, I would encourage you to spend a bit more time with it.
Next Steps
Remember, the answers you are seeking are within you. Sometimes it take patience, or a third party to hold space for you to access those answers. If you’re looking for a more personalized solution and are dying to get out of a funk, perhaps consider booking a private hypnotherapy session with me directly.
In a hypnotherapy session we can access deeper parts of your mind, and connect with the emotion tied to this funk to help you resolve whatever issue is causing it. Hypnotherapy can be a very effective and efficient tool to get out of a funk, one session might be all you need!
You also have the option to book a free consultation with me if you have questions about hypnosis before you book a session. In this free 30-minute consultation we can discuss how this funk has been showing up for you, and the approach I would take to help you resolve it.
Getting out of a funk is possible, it might just require you to dig a little deeper and reflect on what this uncomfortable feeling is telling you. Good luck, you got this!
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